It may not be the worst pain, but it is the most persistent. Exhaustion. Burn-out. Sometimes it’s physical, sometimes emotional, and often both. We pay out energy in every direction. The extra appointments squeezing our schedules. The toll of agonizing decisions. The energy spent trying to respond well to crisis and conflict and chaos. The loss of sleep to grief or worry. The neglect of healthy habits in favor of comfort food and escapist TV (maybe that’s just me). And it all just seems to go on and on.
Dear friends, there are many places to find advice and even help in caring for yourselves. One of my favorites is an organization called David’s Refuge, whose mission is to care for parents whose kids have special needs or life-threatening illnesses. Their goal is to assure these parents of three truths: You are not alone. What you do matters. God loves you.
Maybe you need and can get help from a wonderful organization like David’s Refuge, and be renewed, refreshed, and pampered for a bit. But even a welcome respite is just a taste of what is available to you. Yes, an overnight retreat can rest your body and soul, but the real value of any self-care or comfort given by others is that it points to the unlimited love and compassion God has for you and your child.
He knows. He sees you. You- with your eyes red from weeping and sleeplessness, your stress headache, your hair in desperate need of a cut and style, your extra pounds (maybe that’s just me), your shortened temper.
God loves you.
What can we do?
• Look for and seize those opportunities for rest and refreshment. Read the self-care articles and try to put one or two things into practice. Look for people or organizations that can help. Ask friends and family.
• Nurture your soul: read, do crafts, hike. Just a little of something you love.
• Make sleep a priority. I know, everybody says it. But really. Do it.
• Also, Kirsten, try to eat right and move your body. (And anyone else. But maybe it’s just me.)
These are all good and necessary strategies for dealing with our exhaustion and burn-out. But the biggest thing I have learned is that my deep weariness comes most noticeably when I am carrying loads that are not meant for me.
“Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and YOU WILL FIND REST FOR YOUR SOULS. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30
Sometimes this passage is used to induce guilt: “If you’re tired, you must not have enough faith!” Jesus was not saying that at all. He became tired. He sought rest in lonely places, away from crowds. He collapsed on the way to Calvary. He had perfect faith, and that cross he dropped was certainly the burden He was meant to carry.
Jesus offers, not a saccharine promise of an easy life, but the true sweetness of rest in Him. He knows we will be weary and burdened. But He lifts the heavy end, He leads us to the oasis, He binds our wounds. He walks with us. And He promises that it all matters to Him.
I pray for each of you rest in the long journey.